I got a newsletter from my kids’ school, where the awards were given for things like math, science and literature – okay, I know that’s not where my kids’ strengths are. Then I saw it – photography, art and film making. And I had to respond – why wasn’t my kids’ class participating in this? Kennedy has been at the same school for two years, I never knew about this. She wants to make movies like Mom and Dad, and God help us, be a director. But she’s got a gift there. She “gets” it and is actually able to communicate better in that context than in any other aspect of life. She has a great eye for photography as well. And I’m not blindly bragging. That always annoys me when someone’s kid seems to be “gifted” in everything. Really? No one is gifted in everything and the perfect kid with the overly needy parents just drive me a little nuts. Those of us that have kids on the spectrum know exactly what I’m talking about. Spend a day in our shoes and we’ll show you what effort truly is!
But although sometimes I feel sad or frustrated that my kids got gypped in the communication department – and it hurts to see them struggle so much in things that are so instinctual for the rest of us, I know that they were blessed with other gifts. Although Alex and Bella have their own gifts, they don’t have as much difficulty socially as Kennedy. The fact that she is able to demonstrate in photographs, art and film what she feels is probably more liberating for her than I can ever understand – and I’m in the same business.
What gifts do your kids have through their autism? What new perspective do they bring you that you otherwise wouldn’t see? During Christmastime, I try to think about the gifts I’ve been given – it certainly helps balance the end of year taxes! Miss Montana is autistic – her motto is “Normal is a Dryer Setting.” I can live with that. And
Kennedy is one heck of a director. Alex will be a heck of a video game designer. And Bella? Currently, it’s a rock star, like Katy Perry, who also tells her it’s okay to be different. But I think, in this world, autism or no, she can be the best at whatever she chooses this week. She certainly has the tenacity for it – her nickname from the therapy agencies over the years is “Patton.” 🙂
Meanwhile, back at the point, it really cheesed me off that they were obviously left out of the running for this at all. My good buddy Rob has cerebral palsy. His father always told him, “I know you’re disabled, but you’re going to be the best damn disabled person you can be.” Rob has his Master’s degree and is a brilliant therapist. I guess he is. I don’t want it to be GIVEN to them because they’re autistic. But they darn well better have the opportunity to earn it.
